13 Things I Have To Tell Myself Every Day


1. Be Patient

I have high-functioning anxiety, meaning I'm constantly trying to be perfect and not being exactly where I want to be in my life gives me anxiety. I'm constantly telling myself that I need to be patient, I'm only 22, and I will get there one day as long as I stick to my plans.

2. Stop Judging

Society has taught all of us, myself included, to judge people based on how they look or act during the first impression. I'm constantly correcting my first judgement of a person and giving them the benefit of the doubt. For example with slut-shaming, when I see a girl wearing booty shorts and my first reactions is "omg" I just replace that with "dang she looks bangin good for her". It's helping my attitude and overall happiness, which is a bonus.

3. There are good people in the world

Since there's so much negativity in the world it's so hard for me to believe that it's not all in shambles. I talk about this all the time I feel like. In college, in case you were wondering, I was a Political Science major which basically means let's talk about how messed up the world is. I listen to NPR every single day, and podcasts, and I read books all about the political issues happening in the world. I have to constantly tell myself that there are good people out there who are also trying to make the world better.

4. Be mindful

Again, with high functioning anxiety I'm always thinking about the future and trying to prepare for it. I lose a lot of time that could have been spent enjoying the present because of this. I'm always thinking of what I'm going to be doing tonight, tomorrow, this weekend, next month, etc. I have to consciously tell myself to stop for a minute and be present.

5. Don't buy that

Just because I'm a minimalist doesn't mean that I'm not hit with propaganda every day telling me that stuff is going to make me happy, I still slip up. Every day I have to actively tell myself not to buy whatever I'm considering buying.

6. Adapt

Whenever something doesn't go my way (which happens daily) instead of freaking out I just go okay, now what? There's a reason for this, how do I adapt to make sure it can still work within my plans and maybe even enhance them.

7. Stop preaching

I want everyone to be the best version of themselves, but not everyone wants to be the best version of themselves. This is difficult for me to understand, that lack of drive, but I'm working on it. I'm working on picking my battles, self-monitoring when I'm feeling motivational, and waiting to be asked for advice before I give it.

8. They're going through shit, too

Everyone is going through something and it's not my job to compare problems. Nobody has a perfect life and people deserve the benefit of the doubt. There is absolutely no excuse for being mean. The world is dark enough without my negativity.

9. You don't need them

Speaking of negativity, I have to tell myself that people who are negative, or harassing me, or just simply don't make me feel good or make me better can go fill up the time of someone else. I'm busy enough. You can't change the people around you, but you can change the people around you.

10. Check your energy

As an empath I constantly feel the emotions of everyone around me. When I'm around really intense and particularly very negative emotions my "sponge" fills up very fast and once it's full I'm useless. I have to make sure I take the alone time I need to clear out my energy so I'm at my most productive state. Plus... if I'm full of negative energy I'm going to be cranky and snap at everyone and so it's really just better for everyone if I'm alone.

11. Have you worked towards your goals today?

Even if it's only one thing that took me 5 minutes I'm happier when I know I'm always working towards my goal.

12. It's okay

It's okay that I'm not perfect and never will be. Remember, you're working to be better, not to be perfect.

13. Be grateful

And that I need to stop having survivors guilt about my privilege, which is really something I struggle with. Feeling blessed for everything in my life really helps keep my attitude in check (you can read why that's important here).