Posts tagged relationships
7. To The Man Who Brought Me Back To Life
These breakup letters were sent in by FTS readers

To the man who brought me back to life,

You were one of the hardest breakups I've had because you were the easiest relationship I've had. I know I didn't make it seem like it was hard for me to do, but I know how much you love me and it Killed me to do that to you. Our relationship was doomed to fail from the start. I told you from day one that I wasn't looking for love, or a relationship, or a partner, just company. You just smiled and said "okay", with this hope that I would change my mind if you were patient with me, if you never argued with me, and if you did stuff for me. I told you I wasn't ready for a relationship, yet you kept asking for one. I told you I wasn't ready to fall in love again, yet you knew what buttons to push to make me fall for you. You worked really hard at this relationship so of course on my end it seemed effortless. After my previous relationship that could have been detrimental you came into my life with this remarkable ability to calm me down, and I loved you for it.

Who Even knows how long we were "together" because it was off again on again, me breaking it off over and over and you just patiently waiting behind the scenes of my life for me to come back to you. It's a good plan, I'll admit. But I'm in a time in my life where if someone is going to be in my life, they need to be my partner not just follow me around. I want someone with their own ambitions who also wants to be successful and I don't have to constantly lift them up. You're such a good person, really. And I do love you a lot, but I need more than love. I would rather be alone than just be content in love. I want passion, and success, and ambition, and more than you were offering. I don't think this makes me selfish, I think leading you on would've been selfish.

Communication between us was also rough, which is strange for twO Geminis. There were many times when you were selfish and didn't take my feelings into account and this last time just really put things in perspective for me. We're too different or too similar in the wrong ways. I will always love you, you brought me back to life, but I can't commit to you. And although I would love to stay friends with you, I just know that you would use it to hang in the backdrop until I came back to you because it's been your strategy this far. If I'm going to move on I need a clean break. And I am hurting because I'm losing my best friend, but I really feel like this is actually the right decision. It's also hard because I'm not breaking up with you because I met someone else, or because you cheated, or any reason that could make me hate you. I'm just trying to be a mature adult who is admitting that my feelings for you aren't strong enough for me to commit the rest of my life to you, and that is so much harder to grasp because I so very much waNted you to be the one.

Love always,

T

6. This Is Not A Love Letter
These breakup letters were sent in by FTS readers

Dear S,

            Now this is not a love letter, this for me was a life lesson. We may have not dated for long and it may have been two years ago but for some reason you continue to still pop up in my life. So yes I am going to write it out. We met sophomore year and I was the new girl and for some reason that always gives girls an edge. I had not known anyone until I met you. You had this confidence to you that for some odd reason I liked. However, I later learned it was just you being an ass. We grew pretty close after that and a friend wasn’t the right title but neither was a boyfriend. So what were we? Well we turned out to be “friends,” and after establishing that we lost all contact, only for a brief time. The following year you showed up again, this time wanting more. After you found yourself back in my life, I had people whispering in my ear saying “you guys would be cute” or “date him you don’t have any other guy right now.” Never again, never again will I listen to those words because they are what got me into our relationship.

I did like you at one point, but that year I had moved on, I had met new people, lived my life, but somehow ended up with you. I gave you that chance because hey I liked you once I can do it again right? Not this time. I dated you out of some emptiness I felt or maybe it was loneliness, and our relationship wasn’t all bad, but to this day I look back on it and still can't put together why I dated you. If we're being honest here I never liked you, I rarely ever wanted to be seen with you. So why did I stay with you? Well I don’t truly know, but I do know now that you have taught me so many great things. You taught me that I don’t need a relationship; you taught me that it’s better to be alone then with someone you don’t truly care for.

So I thank you for that! However, that does not mean anything will ever happen with us again. Its over, I feel nothing, and I haven’t felt anything for you since we dated.  I constantly made excuses to myself as to why I stayed with you, but one moment was very clear when I should have said “GO FUCK YOURSELF” I was going through a family crisis, and had to cancel our plans for a dance now putting those two things together anyone can clearly see that the dance means nothing. Everyone but you! You got mad at me for cancelling, hell you went with another girl, you say it was because you had to, but in this world you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. Now for some god-awful reason maybe it was because I was more focused on my family than you, but I stayed and just brushed it off. Now don’t worry you got your revenge by later ditching me, but then I moved away and the moment I made that decision I ended it with you, but you wanted to stay together, or at least friends. I agreed to stay friends out of pity but really I wanted nothing to do with you, I never wanted to see you, talk to you, even hear you name that s how over it I was when I ended it. So now you know when you tried to get back with me months later you had no chance and never will. So go live your life, as I did.

5. Dear "Things Change"
These breakup letters were sent in by FTS readers

Dear “Things change..”,

I guess I was right all along. Deep down I think I knew this would happen. I must have been “blinded by love”, or maybe it was because you told me everything I wanted to hear, or maybe I just wanted it to work so badly that I overlooked all of the red flags. I’m not sure how it happened, but I fell so quickly for you… and you just as quickly took three steps backwards and allowed me to fall flat on my face.

Let me clear something up for you, I’m not writing this because I’m angry, or sad, or confused, and definitely not because I miss you. I am writing this letter to tell you all of the things I kept myself from saying the day that you broke up with me. I wasn’t about to give you the satisfaction of hearing how I felt after you ended it. I thought to myself, why should I even say anything back? He doesn’t deserve it…. And you still don’t. I am writing this to get everything off of my chest, since I have only been able to vent to my best friend about it.

First of all, I gave you so many outs; so many chances to end it while it was still easy for me. I knew distance was hard, and it was only going to get tougher. I tried to explain that to you, but you were determined to be with me no matter what. The first time I didn’t believe you because my walls were still up pretty high. The next couple times you started pushing my walls right over... you told me you were all in and I started hopelessly falling in love with your words. One of my best friends then told me, “If anyone is going to break down those crazy walls you have had built up for so long, it’s going to be him!” And I knew she was right. It was always going to be you…. wasn’t it?

You sucker punched me with this break up. I was not prepared. I was so excited for you to meet my family, for you to come visit me, for all of the fun things we (I) had planned, and super excited for the future. You obviously weren’t. I’m not sure why you did it, maybe there was someone else, maybe you weren’t ready, maybe I wasn’t what you wanted, maybe it was the distance, but no matter what I’m so glad you broke up with me. I was really frustrated at the time because you hurt my ego. That’s one of the toughest parts about break-ups, the feeling of rejection; feeling like you weren’t good enough. (Let me tell you right now, I am more than good enough.) I am at peace with it now. I am not going to let something so miniscule in the grand scheme of things, bring me down.

This is the part where I thank you. Thanks so much for ending things the selfish way you did, that made me realize you really didn’t care the way I hoped you did. Thank you for making it so easy for me to get over this. Thank you for bringing me closer to my best friends and my mom, who I was pushing away while we were together. I honestly could not be more grateful for you. Thank you for this new found motivation to eat better, work out more, and feel passionate about things other than you. Thank you for helping me see that I shouldn’t be disappointed in someone else's decisions, because they are not my own.
 

I was disappointed at first because I felt like I lost my best friend and I couldn't believe your feelings could change so fast, but now I am empowered. I am positive. I am happy.
I sincerely hope you are too.