50 Ways to Practice Self-Love
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1. Make a list of the simple pleasures in your life and be grateful for them

2. Make a sacred place in your house for meditation, relaxation, oracle cards, etc

3. Take time out of your day to spend in that sanctuary place

4. Watch the sunset and just breathe

5. Write yourself a love letter

6. Start a self-love journal and write three things you're proud of yourself for every day

7. Meditate before you go to sleep

8. Drink LOTS of water

9. Make a list of your strengths and tell yourself that when people bring up your weaknesses

10. Get a psychic/spiritual reading - are you happy with your current life's path?

11. Smudge and clear out bad vibes

12. Make a meal-plan with foods you love AND healthy foods

13. Call an old friend or loved one you haven't talked to in a while and catch up

14. Literally feel the sunlight, sit in the sun, suck up the vitamin D, smile

15. Have a self-care day

16. Watch a comedy - or something to make you laugh

17. Make a clear and conscious decision to bring more joy into your life

18. Stretch

19. Make a dream board and write down small goals you can work towards to make them a reality

20. Make a list of things that stress you out and work towards blocking them from doing so

21. Make some sort of art

22. Don't use social media for a week (I promise this one does wonders!) literally delete the apps from your phone

23. Start the habit of saying no to things and people you don't want to spend time on

24. Cut out TV for a week

25. Make love sticky notes and put them on your mirrors, cupboards, etc

26. Start working out -- even 5 minutes a day

27. Start meditating -- even 5 minutes a day

28. Remind yourself that you not only aren't perfect, but that you don't need or want to be

29. Get a massage if you can afford it, or ask someone to give you one

30. Stop comparing yourself to others

31. Look back on how much you've grown throughout your life and be proud of that

32. Garden

33. Tell yourself "I love you"

34. Start saying thank you to yourself (sounds cheesy but just try it)

35. Start saying thank you to others for even the smallest things

36. Make a Badass Bitch playlist with songs that make you feel good about yourself

37. Listen to your Badass Bitch playlist

38. Write a letter to someone who makes you feel any strong emotion

39. Take a day for yourself (I have a post 100 things to do alone)

40. Seek therapy and go routinely 

41. Try out deep breathing - even when you feel calm

42. Write down your favorite self-love affirmations

43. Pick one affirmation per day and write it somewhere you will see it often & repeat it to yourself every time you see it

44. Go to bed early

45. Wear clothes that make you feel confident

46. Remind yourself to feel your emotions and remind yourself that you're entitled to them

47. Take the time in the morning to do whatever will make you feel good about yourself

48. Make a list of hobbies that bring you joy and plan them into your life

49. Spend time in nature

50. Stop doing things that do not make you feel good about yourself

 

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100 Things To Do Alone

Being comfortable alone is the difference between mature and immature people. Learning how to be alone is one of the most important things we need to practice to be independent and well-rounded individuals. It will also help increase your self-awareness. Here's a list of 100 things you can do alone if you're having trouble thinking of what to do.

1. Clean

2. Budget

3. Take personality tests

4. Binge watch a TV show

5. Research your zodiac sign

6. Do a social media cleanse

7. Purge your house (declutter)

8. Watch YouTube videos and tutorials

9. Declutter your social media, emails, etc.

10. Give yourself a manicure/pedicure

11. Turn off all of your electronics and wifi for one day and enjoy being off the grid

12. Create a "good vibes" playlist

13. Make a to-do list of things that need to be done around your home

14.  Do some of the things on 13's list

15. Have a picnic

16. Go for a hike

17.  Meditate

18. Stay at an airbnb by yourself

19. Go to a crystal shop and buy one that speaks to you

20. Start a bullet journal

21. Get a massage

22. Zentangle

23. Go to a free or inexpensive concert

24. Try a local coffee shop, get the barista's favorite drink, and people watch

25. Feng Shui your house

26. Go see a movie

27. Do yoga

28. Smudge your home with sage

29. Take a nap without setting an alarm

30. Paint or color a coloring book

31. Go to a local event in your area

32. Purge expired food, medicine, make up, etc. 

33. Meal prep for the week

34. Take a cooking class

35. Make a terrarium

36. Write a letter to someone you haven't forgiven, burn it with a bay leaf that you've written "forgiveness" on, and let it go

37. Test teas at Teavana

38. Read a book

39. Look through photo albums

40. Get a facial

41. Get an oil diffuser, essential oils, and learn how to use them

42. Get a smoothie, juice or bowl (this one always cheers me up :))

43. Start a dream journal

44. Take a road trip to another city in your state

45. Make a list of habits you want to change

46. Plan out how to change those habits

47.  Take a martial arts class

48. Take a class to learn how to dance

49. Research survival skills

50. Learn how to play an instrument

51. Watch TV shows from your childhood

52. Take a self-defense class

53. Stretch

54. Do a Sudoku

55. Make a vision board

56. Do the crossword

57. Plan a trip

58. Do a puzzle

59. Sign up for a free online course

60. Research mental illness and how to be more tolerant towards it

61. Find a mentor

62. Learn about another culture or religion

63. Go to a museum

64. Start a side hustle

65. Eat samples at Costco

66. Walk barefoot in nature

67. Workout

68. Prioritize and declare your boundaries

69. Forgive yourself

70. Organize

71. Go to an open mic night

72. Write a letter to your future self

73. Reflect on your emotions, thoughts, and resilience

74. Bake

75. Drink green tea

76. Create a meditation area in your home (peaceful, calming, with crystals)

77. Make a list of power words that speak to you

78. Make a bucket list

79. Go wine tasting

80. Watch a documentary

81. Refurbish an old piece of furniture

82. Start a food diary

83. Write a letter

84. Play with animals at a shelter

85. Create bags of goodies to keep in your car to pass out to homeless folks you pass by

86. Write a short story

87. Create a morning routine

88. Garden (or start one!)

89. Create a night routine

90. Cook something new

91. Do something festive for whatever holiday is coming up

92. Go to brunch (and drink mimosas or bloody marys without guilt)

93. Start a blog

94. Do a face mask

95. Subscribe and listen to podcasts

96. Take a bath (one with pink Himalayan salt and rose petals and everything)

97. Solo-date

98. Stargaze - learn the constellations

99. Start writing a book

100. Go to a thrift store

What To Do and Not To Do When You're Feeling Vulnerable

Everyone goes through periods in their life when they are feeling lonely, depressed, unwanted, unwelcome, and all other vulnerable emotions. It is critically important to know healthy habits to form when you're feeling vulnerable and which of your unhealthy habits you need to stop asap.

Do ponder why you're feeling the way you are

Really sit and take the time to think about why you're feeling vulnerable. Why are you feeling lonely? Why are you feeling depressed? Get down to the root of it. Usually it's not what it appears to be. Yes it seems like you're feeling lonely because you're going through a breakup, but really you're feeling lonely because you lost a part of yourself during that relationship and you're missing that part of you, so the remedy is to find yourself again. Sit inside your head for a while and see if you can figure it out. After all, nobody knows yourself better than you.

Don't participate in activities that give you instant gratification

These include, but are not limited to, shopping, eating (I mean obviously you need to eat, but don't binge or go crazy), promiscuity, expensive grooming, etc. You need more happiness in your life or you wouldn't be feeling so vulnerable, but make sure you are attaining this through slow-and-steady methods. Exercise, join clubs or groups, put effort into your other relationships, etc. Like I said, you need to find yourself again most likely, and activities involving instant gratification will only make you feel more lost and overwhelmed and you'll only lose more parts.

Do consider therapy

Your friends, family, and even I am not qualified to give you unbiased, educated advice about your life. Having a third party help you identify what your feeling is invaluable. I would suggest trying out different therapists until you find one you really click with. You'll be surprised at how much it helps just to have someone to talk to who won't judge you.

don't rely on people to fill the void

The main issue with relying on people when you feel vulnerable is it gives them a lot of power, and if I were you I wouldn't give many people that power. When you're vulnerable you're more susceptible to influences, including bad influences. When your lonely is not the time to run to someone you're not really into just to feel better, because once you do, you'll start associating that person with making you feel better. If there's one thing to keep in mind when you're feeling down it's that drugs, alcohol and people should not be used to make you feel better, but to feel EVEN better.

DO Start A Journal

Start a log of your thoughts and feelings. Maybe use color coding for each emotion, write with blue when you're sad and green when you're lonely. It might help for future use when you feel a vulnerable emotion to go back and see when you were feeling an emotion and why. Plus writing is therapeutic and will help you organize your feelings. Don't underestimate the power of journaling.

Don't talk to everyone about how your feeling

To be straight with you, most people don't want to know about the problems in your life. And many of the ones who seem to will judge you for feeling a particular way or will try to give you unwanted advice on how to solve it without empathizing with the real issue. I hope you have at least one person in your life who will listen without judgement, but if you don't, you definitely need a therapist. Don't give people the power of knowing you're vulnerable if they don't deserve it.

Do start a new project

Pay attention to things you might be drawn to, such as, learning guitar, gardening, restoration, etc. The creative things that you are drawn to are going to help put inspiration back into your life. I wrote a post 6 Reasons Why We Need To Be Inspired that talks about why being inspired is so important. There is also another post I wrote about how to put inspiration into your life: 7 Ways to Become Inspired and Find Your Passion. If you're feeling vulnerable, you're probably feeling uninspired.

Don't be super hard on yourself

Cut yourself some slack. You do not have to be or act a certain way, including society's idea of what it means to be strong. Just because you are feeling doesn't make you weak, in fact, I would argue it makes you strong. You have to be extremely brave to let yourself be vulnerable. Believe me, this is something I struggle with hardcore. As long as you're doing the best you can you should be proud of yourself. If getting out of bed is something you dread, then be proud that you did it. Like I said... it takes guts to face the world everyday.

Do tell yourself you love yourself

This is self explanatory. You need to tell yourself, literally, "I love you", over and over until you believe it. I do this as a mantra to help me fall asleep. It's not conceited, you need to love yourself. For some inspiration there is this great clip of one of my favorite movies you should watch...

13 Things I Have To Tell Myself Every Day
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1. Be Patient

I have high-functioning anxiety, meaning I'm constantly trying to be perfect and not being exactly where I want to be in my life gives me anxiety. I'm constantly telling myself that I need to be patient, I'm only 22, and I will get there one day as long as I stick to my plans.

2. Stop Judging

Society has taught all of us, myself included, to judge people based on how they look or act during the first impression. I'm constantly correcting my first judgement of a person and giving them the benefit of the doubt. For example with slut-shaming, when I see a girl wearing booty shorts and my first reactions is "omg" I just replace that with "dang she looks bangin good for her". It's helping my attitude and overall happiness, which is a bonus.

3. There are good people in the world

Since there's so much negativity in the world it's so hard for me to believe that it's not all in shambles. I talk about this all the time I feel like. In college, in case you were wondering, I was a Political Science major which basically means let's talk about how messed up the world is. I listen to NPR every single day, and podcasts, and I read books all about the political issues happening in the world. I have to constantly tell myself that there are good people out there who are also trying to make the world better.

4. Be mindful

Again, with high functioning anxiety I'm always thinking about the future and trying to prepare for it. I lose a lot of time that could have been spent enjoying the present because of this. I'm always thinking of what I'm going to be doing tonight, tomorrow, this weekend, next month, etc. I have to consciously tell myself to stop for a minute and be present.

5. Don't buy that

Just because I'm a minimalist doesn't mean that I'm not hit with propaganda every day telling me that stuff is going to make me happy, I still slip up. Every day I have to actively tell myself not to buy whatever I'm considering buying.

6. Adapt

Whenever something doesn't go my way (which happens daily) instead of freaking out I just go okay, now what? There's a reason for this, how do I adapt to make sure it can still work within my plans and maybe even enhance them.

7. Stop preaching

I want everyone to be the best version of themselves, but not everyone wants to be the best version of themselves. This is difficult for me to understand, that lack of drive, but I'm working on it. I'm working on picking my battles, self-monitoring when I'm feeling motivational, and waiting to be asked for advice before I give it.

8. They're going through shit, too

Everyone is going through something and it's not my job to compare problems. Nobody has a perfect life and people deserve the benefit of the doubt. There is absolutely no excuse for being mean. The world is dark enough without my negativity.

9. You don't need them

Speaking of negativity, I have to tell myself that people who are negative, or harassing me, or just simply don't make me feel good or make me better can go fill up the time of someone else. I'm busy enough. You can't change the people around you, but you can change the people around you.

10. Check your energy

As an empath I constantly feel the emotions of everyone around me. When I'm around really intense and particularly very negative emotions my "sponge" fills up very fast and once it's full I'm useless. I have to make sure I take the alone time I need to clear out my energy so I'm at my most productive state. Plus... if I'm full of negative energy I'm going to be cranky and snap at everyone and so it's really just better for everyone if I'm alone.

11. Have you worked towards your goals today?

Even if it's only one thing that took me 5 minutes I'm happier when I know I'm always working towards my goal.

12. It's okay

It's okay that I'm not perfect and never will be. Remember, you're working to be better, not to be perfect.

13. Be grateful

And that I need to stop having survivors guilt about my privilege, which is really something I struggle with. Feeling blessed for everything in my life really helps keep my attitude in check (you can read why that's important here).

12 Reminders for my Best Friend

1. Feel all of your emotions

Sometimes you are super emotional and cry at every baby or puppy you see, and other times you are a stone cold sociopath. Both are perfectly okay and I want you to know that you can be crazy emotional, or crazy emotionless and I will still love you. Feeling all of your emotions is so healthy and in order to get to know yourself and have a good relationship with yourself you need to feel all of those emotions. Take your time and feel them for as long as you need to, I'll support you along the whole roller coaster without complaint.

2. I'm not going to baby you though...

Because I love you I am not going to let you be mediocre. You deserve to be the best version of yourself and allowing you to settle in your career, in your health, and in your relationships is not going to happen. I'm going to kick your butt when you need it because I love you enough to care.

3. You're more than enough

And by that I mean for yourself. You have a whole, complete soul that does not need to find another to be fully functioning. I know that you and I are soul mates, as in our souls match up perfectly and harmoniously, but we do not need each other to be complete. And you definitely do not need a partner to be complete either. You are such a well-rounded, down-to-earth, all around good hearted person and even if you are the only person you have (which will never be true, hello... here I am...) you will and are complete.

4. You're a boss, act like it

Seriously. Fuck society. You don't need to walk around smiling. RBF is not a thing. Men don't walk around smiling, you don't need to either. Stand up tall with confidence knowing that you're a boss ass bitch who people can't mess with, because guess what, you are. Be assertive about how you're feeling at work, with your family, and with your relationships because your feelings are important and you deserve to have healthy relationships in each of those areas. Do what you want because YOU want to.

5. You're beautiful

The reason why this is number 5 and not number 1 is because I feel like you do not need to be reminded of how beautiful you are as often as the first 4. With that said, I want you to know that you are, inside and out, one of the most beautiful people I have ever met in my life. I'm not sure how you're not a celebrity yet tbh. People should be obsessed with you by now.

6. You're going to make it

Enjoy every time period in your life and don't hurry to the next one. Take in every experience and learn as much as you can from it. You're fine right now and you are going to be fine in the future. You have a support system behind you, one that includes me, and no matter what happens you're going to succeed. We won't let you fail.

7. I'm going to need you, too

And I know you'll be there, you always have been. If there's one person who I know has my back, it's you. I've put you through a lot and I am so eternally grateful that you're still in my life. I need you to remind me that I'm a boss, to kick my butt when I'm making excuses that don't let me reach my full potential, and when I'm not allowing myself to feel my emotions. You're my main (wo)man and I'm going to need you, too.

8. I'm not going to judge you

You can tell me whatever you want and I will not tell another human being. I'm never going to judge you for your choices or actions. I know you have a good heart and you're figuring yourself out, too. Our friendship is a safe space and it's the reason we've made it this far, with everything that has happened. I might point things out to you, or tell you something you did was dumb, but I will not judge you for it.

9. I'm not going to let you settle down

You can have a family and stuff, in fact that's preferred because your kids will be so stinking cute and I want to spoil them, but you are never going to get stuck in a rut. I'm going to pull you out of your routines and monotony for the rest of your life because that is how we'll gain wisdom to pass down. I want us to have so many stories to tell when we're old that people would rather listen to us than watch wheel of fortune (or whatever old people will doing in the future).

10. You can be whoever you want to be

Whatever personality you feel like changing into (well... within reason.. you can't like join a cult or whatever) I will support. I want to be here to help you grow as a person. Preferably, I want us to grow together. We can lean on each other for support for the rest of our lives.

11. You do not need to please everyone

I love how much thought and effort you put into your relationships with people, platonic and romantic. Every single person who has you in their life is so lucky and they should know that. With that said, you need to be happy before you can make others happy. Make sure your pitcher is empty before you start pouring into other cups. That means you cannot please everyone, and that's okay, pick the ones who are going to always be around you and focus on those relationships.

12. I will always unconditionally love you

As in I will help you without expecting it in return, I will give you things without expecting anything back, and I will stand up for you whenever you need it. I know that you would do the same thing for me and that's why your worthy of it. I do not go out of my way for everyone and I am selfish that way, you know this, but I will for you, anytime, anywhere, no matter what.

22 Things I've Learned In 22 Years

There really isn’t anything cool that happens when you turn 22, so I decided to make a list of important life lessons I’ve learned so far.

22. I will never be done learning

Yes, these are 22 lessons I have learned. They are not the only lessons and there are more that I learn every day. My favorite hobby is learning and so I will never quit learning and I hope you chose a similar route as well.

21. People are only mean when they feel threatened

Enough said. If they’re being mean to you it’s their way of trying to pound you into a lesser person so they will seem bigger and therefore win. Turns out life is not a competition. If you combat their hate with love, it may not diminish their hate, but everyone around you will see them as the horrible person instead of you and their plan will have backfired.

20. You can always do something

I hear a lot of conversation revolving around how people “these days” are apathetic. That is, in my opinion, because the problems we’re presented with seem so large we become overwhelmed and take a nap instead. There is always something you can do, no matter how small, to help. Pick a cause you really believe in and do something to make the problem smaller. If your cause is animal rights then foster animals, volunteer at shelters, stop eating meat, etc. You don’t have to take down the whole establishment to make a difference.

19. Nobody is right

Unless you’re an expert, which I personally do not believe is even possible until at least age 70, you are not right about anything. Not 100% at least. Life is not black and white. A simple statement like “the sky is blue” is not technically right because there are a million different ways to prove that statement wrong. We may make some valid points on subjects, but we are never fully right.

18. Everyone wants to feel important

The one common thread that ties everyone together is that every single person wants to feel important. Knowing this is power and you can do a lot of good with it. Everyone wants to feel special in their own way, so make people feel special and you have just won them over for the rest of their lives. You now also know what motivates people. Do you think people work hard to earn loads of cash because they enjoy stress? No. They do it to feel important.

17. You can be as many different people as you want to be

Try out different personalities throughout your life. I’ve tried flower child, career-focused, goth, stoner, workaholic, and more. All of them together made me who I am. Remember to be genuine with each one. I wasn’t a hippie with black eye liner, I was a cocoon that was undecided. If you like who you are great! If you don’t, change. Find inspiration and try it out.

16. Everything is temporary

Extremely temporary. College feels like it lasted 3 days. Whenever you’re in a stressful situation just remember that it’s temporary and will be gone soon. This really helped my anxiety, too. I think about this a lot, actually. I hope you will too.

15. Be genuine

People flock towards genuine people, trust me I know. And they cling to them. My theory is that people want to be figured out, they want their actions to be justified, and they want to feel like they belong. I remember in high school a friend of mine had this book that explained your complete zodiac through your birthday. It took about 5 minutes of pulling it out for their to be a line of people waiting to hear their birthday’s traits. A person who knows who they are does not need a book to tell them, in fact they would be the person like me who sat and listened to all of the readings. The beauty of being genuine is that it can’t be broken. It is such a strength that I point to for any success I may have.

14. Enjoy alone time

Everyone is different. However, everyone needs some amount of alone time. You need time to get to know yourself, alone. I preach this like it’s my religion. You are never alone. You always are with yourself. Tricky concept, but give it some thought. How much alone time a person needs depends on where you are on the spectrum. I am on the halfway mark. I need equal amounts of alone time as social time. My sister is on the far left, she probably needs 1 day of alone time per 100 days of social interaction. The only way to know where you are on the spectrum is to test it out. I recommend pushing your limits because alone time is where you discover who you are. My senior year of high school was spent almost entirely alone and I’m so grateful for it. I realized what music I liked and what MY opinions were of it. Going to the movies by myself was the best because I was allowed to have my own, independent thoughts about the movie without hearing other opinions. I found out who I was (for the most part). So during the half of the time I’m spending alone, I’m constantly learning about myself. THIS is how you become a genuine person that people gravitate to.

13. Your life is not about you

You don’t walk at graduation for yourself, you do it for your circle (your parents, friends, children, etc). Making a lot of money will mean nothing if you are not using it to make other people’s lives better. If you’re not empowering others you’re weakening yourself. It’s other people’s image of you that’s real, specifically your circle’s image of you. If you die in a car accident it doesn’t matter to you, you’ll be dead, but your circle will never be the same. Walk through life with this mentality. Your purpose is your circle.

If a person lives alone in a forest and never meets another person, are they real?

12. Stop apologizing for your emotions

Especially to yourself. You have a right to feel every single emotion that you do and you need to really take time to focus on them. Our society has us believing that emotions are a sign of weakness. On the contrary, they are your strength. If you know exactly who you are, and you have empathy, and you feel things deeply and recognize that, then you’re already much more evolved than many of the people in our society. Consider it a superpower that you can feel things at all. Do not take it for granted, you would be surprised at how difficult it is for some people to feel.

11. Stop buying stuff

If it does not ignite inspiration or passion within you and it is not essential for your survival, do not buy it. Go to Disneyland or Fiji instead.

10. Don’t settle for mediocrity

This one is huge for young people and especially for women. DO NOT drink bad coffee, read horrible books, watch mainstream news, stay in a boring relationship, settle for bad sex, etc. When others are being mediocre, like when your uncle is being a bigot, call them out on it. Don’t settle for mediocre people. Shake intelligent people who are wasting their potential. Demand excellence in everything and everyone around you and don’t apologize for it.

9. Your soul is not limited

I once had a teacher who told me trust, love, and passion are like a piggy bank and the more of it you give out the less of it you have. This is completely false. Your soul does not have a limit. Fall in love with everything and everyone you can. Be so trustworthy that it’s suffocating. Be passionate about everything you fall in love with and everything you want to change. I could rant about politics, environmental issues, farming, injustice, etc. I am passionate about everything, and it’s what lights the fire in my soul and makes me more appealing. Don’t let passion burn you out, but rather boredom.

8. Be kind

If you don’t have anything nice to say DON’T SAY ANYTHING AT ALL. This brings me to my next point…

7. Shut up

You want to know what you learn while talking? Nothing. This world is so loud, and according to older generations it is especially loud right now. Stop talking and listen for a minute, a day, a week, whatever. Nobody cares about your opinions, what you had for lunch, or what happened in your dream on social media. If you’ve never done a day of silence I highly suggest it. Once you’ve done a day try a week. Once you done a week try two. They’re addicting because they’re life changing and the perspective you get about the world is invaluable.

6. Do not argue

Everyone who knows me is laughing at this heading right now. I do not mean do not have debates and intelligent conversations about your political, religious, and social beliefs and opinions. THAT is crucial to keep the society train moving in a forward direction. What I mean is, if someone thinks they’re right and you think they’re wrong, you need to shut up about it. Do not contradict people, you look like a jackass. Sometimes I’ll do this by accident, for example, someone will quote the wrong person and I’ll say “oh I think that was so-and-so, actually”. As soon as the other person says “no, I’m right”, you say “okay”. It’s not worth an argument. Even when you get to the point of googling it and you are right, you still look like an asshole to everyone else. So shhhh. PLUS... the less you say the less people can hold against you... there's a reason why quiet people are usually more appealing to others.

5. Drama

I learned this actually very young, I never cared for it. If someone brought drama into my life I dropped them from my life. You can decide what level of drama you want to drop people at. For me, it’s when the majority of conversations revolve around negativity and/or gossip. This would look like someone who during dinner spends 84% of the time complaining about their boyfriend or talking bad about a particular person. People are dying, I do not care about your hatred, and I’m better than that kind of negativity.

4. Network

All I need to say about this post is… the more people you know the more successful you will be. Life will be easier if you can call someone who knows how to fix a problem you have. Get contact or social media information from everyone you meet and keep in touch.

3. If people like you, you’re life is much, much easier

People do not go out of their way for people they dislike. I know I don’t. If you want people to go out of their way to help you with something, be their friend. For example, I worked in a sports bar for what feels like forever. I knew that I needed to make sure that my “outs” were completed ASAP because I had a 9am class to get to the next morning and I did not need to waste my night cleaning. Also, I knew that I could only work three days a week and needed to make as much as possible in that time frame. So what did I do? I paid the hosts $5 each for the night to bus my tables for me and I was always overly nice to them (unlike the other servers) so I would get the larger parties that would pay more and be sat first. When the other servers liked me they would do things like take out the trash and refill the ice when I asked (nicely). And the bottom line is, I was always out earlier than everyone else and made more than enough money because I had help.

2. People are not going to treat you like how they want to be treated

No, but really, I mean this. People are going to judge you much harsher than they judge themselves. If you forget to use your blinker, you’re a horrible drunkard who needs their license taken away and a bus pass. If they forget to use their blinker then they think “oops, well everyone knows I’m a good driver I just forgot this time”. And EVERYONE DOES THIS. Something that has made me a happier person is recognizing when I do this and adjusting. Like “No, Tyler, they’re not a horrible driver, you forget to signal too”. Also, it means I need to be on my game, and the best thing I can do is use my blinker every time. (This applies to other scenarios, obviously, but this one is relatable)

1. When life gives you lemons… be grateful

The universe doesn’t owe you anything, let alone fruit that is high in vitamin C, antioxidants, and is anti-inflammatory. Just because you didn’t expect life to give you lemons does not mean you should be rude and not accept the gift. I completely understand this metaphor is used to describe situations that are a lot more serious than just lemons. If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that the coldest thing the universe can do to you is ignore you. Accept those lemons with open arms. Learn as much as you can about them. Make lemonade, and lemon bars, lemon meringue pie, and even some savory lemon pepper chicken. And don’t forget to say thank you.