8. Excerpts From A Torn Notebook

These breakup letters were sent in by FTS readers

(these do not reference only one person)



 

Intimately distant for

3 years.

How the feelings can rush with a look,

And suddenly gone

With the turn of your lazy head.

 

***

 

Your presence beside me is unnecessary.

Is that what you are? Unnecessary.

Like the vines on a tree that have reached their growth

Only existing to strangle and strain,

You exist unnecessarily.

And yet I want you to come and talk to me again.

I want your warm breath and signature smell to enter into my space.

The door is open,

it’s open it’s open,

and you walk the other way.

I don’t understand and guess I never will, your feelings and mine.


 

***

 

I want you in my life but I also want you out of it. I want to enjoy being with other people without having to think about you, or wonder if you think about me. Don’t we all. I want to be able to step past what was there and leave it as is. Damn, I could fill an entire page just with questions and we would still never get from point A to point B.

 

***

 

Take that gaze from my nose to the back of your throat, turn it internally and take a good look at yourself. Stare at the way you treated me with passive aggression, holding the truth right there, at the back of your throat. Silence hurts more than anger. And you have worn my bones with the ghost you decided to use to interact with me rather than being there yourself. I’m sure she was better for you than I, to begin with.

Funny.

My favorite part of you was that deep stare with a black hole pair of pupils. I guess you can now take that stare and turn it to her.

***

 

You emptied me.

I was already there, at peace

You little piece

of shit.