5. Dear "Things Change"

These breakup letters were sent in by FTS readers

Dear “Things change..”,

I guess I was right all along. Deep down I think I knew this would happen. I must have been “blinded by love”, or maybe it was because you told me everything I wanted to hear, or maybe I just wanted it to work so badly that I overlooked all of the red flags. I’m not sure how it happened, but I fell so quickly for you… and you just as quickly took three steps backwards and allowed me to fall flat on my face.

Let me clear something up for you, I’m not writing this because I’m angry, or sad, or confused, and definitely not because I miss you. I am writing this letter to tell you all of the things I kept myself from saying the day that you broke up with me. I wasn’t about to give you the satisfaction of hearing how I felt after you ended it. I thought to myself, why should I even say anything back? He doesn’t deserve it…. And you still don’t. I am writing this to get everything off of my chest, since I have only been able to vent to my best friend about it.

First of all, I gave you so many outs; so many chances to end it while it was still easy for me. I knew distance was hard, and it was only going to get tougher. I tried to explain that to you, but you were determined to be with me no matter what. The first time I didn’t believe you because my walls were still up pretty high. The next couple times you started pushing my walls right over... you told me you were all in and I started hopelessly falling in love with your words. One of my best friends then told me, “If anyone is going to break down those crazy walls you have had built up for so long, it’s going to be him!” And I knew she was right. It was always going to be you…. wasn’t it?

You sucker punched me with this break up. I was not prepared. I was so excited for you to meet my family, for you to come visit me, for all of the fun things we (I) had planned, and super excited for the future. You obviously weren’t. I’m not sure why you did it, maybe there was someone else, maybe you weren’t ready, maybe I wasn’t what you wanted, maybe it was the distance, but no matter what I’m so glad you broke up with me. I was really frustrated at the time because you hurt my ego. That’s one of the toughest parts about break-ups, the feeling of rejection; feeling like you weren’t good enough. (Let me tell you right now, I am more than good enough.) I am at peace with it now. I am not going to let something so miniscule in the grand scheme of things, bring me down.

This is the part where I thank you. Thanks so much for ending things the selfish way you did, that made me realize you really didn’t care the way I hoped you did. Thank you for making it so easy for me to get over this. Thank you for bringing me closer to my best friends and my mom, who I was pushing away while we were together. I honestly could not be more grateful for you. Thank you for this new found motivation to eat better, work out more, and feel passionate about things other than you. Thank you for helping me see that I shouldn’t be disappointed in someone else's decisions, because they are not my own.
 

I was disappointed at first because I felt like I lost my best friend and I couldn't believe your feelings could change so fast, but now I am empowered. I am positive. I am happy.
I sincerely hope you are too.